Mary-Sue's Revenge

(1) The Ballad of Mary-Sue (Tolkien)

By Technoelfie
Reviewed by Kathryn A on 17th August 2003 (5)
Tags: Short Story

A light-hearted poetic complaint from an ordinary girl about the impossibility of competing with Mary-Sue for the affections of the one she desires -- and poking fun at all the Mary-Sue stories about Legolas.

(2) Divine Intervention: The Revenge of Mary-Sue (Tolkien)

By Technoelfie
Reviewed by Kathryn A on 17th August 2003 (6)
Tags: Novel

This is a sequel of sorts to "The Ballad of Mary-Sue" in that the anonymous complainer in that then does what was threatened in the last lines of that poem -- she comes back as Mary-Sue. Except that she isn't a Mary-Sue -- not quite. With one notable exception.
    "What the hell have you done with your hair?" he demanded after an uncomfortable silence.
    Instinctively, my hand went up to finger the object of his wrath. I was shocked to encounter perfect, lustruous locks that obviously spilled down my back down to my waist. It was a long cry from the birds' nest with which I had left home -- it rivalled elf hair in perfection. Well, at least the color was as dark as ever.
    I should have been happy, but Legolas' look didn't encourage that sort of reaction. "What?" I mumbled as he continued to frown.
    "You do not also happen to possess a marvelous singing voice, do you," he said chillingly.
    I shook my head. I _so_ hoped I didn't.

But this isn't just a self-insertion story trying to be realistic about what a normal person could manage to do in Middle-Earth (like nearly get killed, a lot). It also takes a twist on the whole Mary-Sue genre, while at the same time turning into a sort of quest. This is both parody and serious; poking fun at itself and also being thoughtful; both fluffy and dark. And strangely enough it seems to work.

Here's one of the thoughtful bits:
    Elves move much like cats. Also, much like cats, they live in the moment. Whenever they experience something, it is always deeply -- they will be deeply moved by a beautiful sunset, and equally deeply by the loss of a comrade. They feelings go deep, but in a way so does their dependence on those feelings.
    They _need_ the joy. They _need_ the sorrow. Elves are the kind of species that can get high on _trees_.

Normally I don't pay much attention to Legolas -- oh I like him, but I'm not that interested in him. However, this Legolas is much darker, caustic and more dangerous than I'm used to seeing him. I think part of that is the fallout of the bad things that had happened to him here, because I still don't even see the moveverse Legolas as being like that, but I think it fits here -- and that suddenly makes him a far more fascinating character, worthy of attention. Because he's one of those guys who Suffers Beautifully.

A very different story. Read with an open mind.

Please note that the Prologue is "chapter" 2, and thus should be read first, then Chapter 1, then Chapter 3. I didn't, and it was a bit confusing.

Warning: some parts of this story are rated MA for things done by consenting adults.

Interestingly enough, I found this story courtesy of (a site which is no longer there's links page) because I was looking for sites that linked to me.

(3) Personal Demons (Tolkien)

By Technoelfie
Reviewed by Kathryn A on 17th August 2003 (7)

Sequel to "Divine Intervention: The Revenge of Mary-Sue". It seems that this series gets darker and more disturbing as it goes on, for this story is definitely in the dark psychological variety. For what would any being do after being suddenly burdened with the memory of years of torment, of being a love-slave? It's understandable that his relationship with Anna would be... difficult. ("All I need is the air that I breathe, and to love you" is playing right now -- how apt.) I'm not sure if the two chapters up are the only thing intended, or whether there's more, though that may be all, since it says "THE END" at the end of Chapter 2.

This story leaves me thoughtful and pondering. Or maybe just stunned.

I can't recommend it, because it's definitely got the sex and more sex, even though it is part of the plot, I'd hardly call it general audience, even if it isn't X-rated.